The Cover Guy looked pretty good on-line. The profile sounded good and the photos didn’t look like they came out of a high school yearbook – and, I guess to show his legitimacy or maybe just to show off, he had even included one that was the cover of an industry magazine.
So, we met one evening after work for a coffee at a casual place I like that also has really great food if we happened to be inclined to eat. When he walked in I was struck by his size, he was shorter and smaller than it had appeared from his profile. And he did want to have something to eat so we ordered and sat for a while chatting. Well it wasn’t really a conversation – rather, he held forth for a while and told me everything he thought I needed to know about him and about his success in his profession and his history while I listened with polite interest. I really do try to listen to these guys – I find it’s always helpful to be able to remember what they say, comes in handy when you hear them say something different the next time you talk. He said lots of the usual things that some men say when they want to impress you, but when he got around to his questions to me and focused on my experiences in on-line dating, I found myself wondering if he was doing a research interview.
After a reasonable period of time, I said it had been nice to meet him and that I thought it was time that I was heading home. He wanted to walk me out and to my car and linked arms with me as we left the bistro. Except that he put his hand in my arm as if he was the woman and I was the man. And I was again struck by his slight build and short stature walking next to me. Something was off, something wasn’t quite right, and I had sneaking suspicion about what it might be.
As it happened, (and I would’ve made it happen this way anyway even if it hadn’t been true) we reached the street where his car was parked before we reached my car. I released him from his escort and said that mine was just ahead and thanked him for the evening. Thus I was able to watch him walk to and get into his car, which in reality was quite a bit older and more dilapidated and he had led me to believe with all of his impressive conversation.
First thing I did when I returned home was to go online and look at “his” profile. I read through it again and looked through the photos and studied the one with his face on the cover. I thought to myself “well let’s just see if this is what it claims to be”. I looked up the magazine online and tried to find covers from past issues. It was difficult without a magazine subscription, but I finally found a way around it and was able to find a page full of previous covers. Imagine my surprise when I came upon a cover exactly as shown in “his” online profile – with the same red T-shirt and the same arms crossed pose and the same background color, but for some reason the face on the matching body wasn’t “his” – it was John Mayer’s! “He” had photo-shopped “his” head onto John Mayer’s body!
Never did find out if “he” was really a “he” or was in disguise for whatever reason…
Just goes to show, (you knew it was coming…) you can’t judge a book by its cover.
